Get off the One Way Bus to Crazy Town
Try to live in the moment, be present with your partner, live in the now. Now is all that we really have. You don’t need to be thinking about where your kids are going to take piano lessons when you haven’t even met your partner’s family yet.
When we trip out about the future it can cause a lot of fear. When we have a lot of fear in our lives we tend to block opportunities, we try to control the situation too much. When we are in a ultra controlling mode there is no room for Universal spirit to step in take the lead.
In a new relationship with someone your only destination should be love town, sounds corny, but seeing love in every situation is your only priority. It will make you more relaxed, open, and able to enjoy each moment.
Don’t Be an Ass
You don’t know this person yet, so don’t assume you know what they are going to do in every situation. We all know the saying, assuming makes an ass out of you and me, but it’s true. Do not try and predict what he or she is going to do, say, or act like because it will drive you absolutely bonkers, and next thing you know you’re hoping on a one way trip to crazy town.
When you try to predict things you set yourself up for rough expectations/ Trying to predict if your partner will pick you up on a first date or pay for the meal, or you split it, or they bring you flowers on your birthday, or maybe they’re into making cards — you don’t know, so don’t go bonkers. If you try to play out situations that may happen by assuming, it’s no good. You will get your hopes up, something weird will happen, and boom — You’re an ass.
See your partner for them – the true them, their insides. Recognize and get to know their ‘ness. Truly listen, try to learn what it is that makes them motivated and excited about life. That is where you want to focus your energy when you are first dating someone.
Don’t Get Hyphy
Stay calm. Take things slow – it can be easy to get caught up in today’s busy technology age where everything is moving fast, things need to progress quickly, and in order to feel like your getting anywhere you have to take the next step, do more, be more, etc. Dating is not rocket science, so don’t make it seem like it is.
Don’t make things harder than they need to be, when there is something that comes up you disagree with – “use your words.” Sound familiar? Yeah, well Mom had the right idea with that advice. Respect the other person’s time, because you respect yours.
When you try to control the other person, the activities you do with that person, or just your time together in general – THAT is my definition at getting hyphy. (For this context) You need to stay calm, allow things to happen naturally and try not to force anything in the beginning. Be open for the new relationship and let whatever comes of it, come.
Say NO in The Beginning
When you’re first getting to know someone it’s inevitable things are going to come up that you don’t agree with or like – you need to voice that. If you don’t stick up for what you believe and feel in the beginning, you will fall into the trap of never doing so.
It’s easy to go along with what the other person wants to do in order to be easy going – it’s normal! You want the other person to like you, they are thinking the same thing. You need to say no to the activities that don’t ignite your ‘ness, the situations that don’t align with YOUR highest good, or be around people who don’t bring the best out in you. That is going to require to say no at times.
Standing up for what you feel is best for you is sexy, and it helps you keep your own sense of self when joining a relationship with someone else. Think of your non-negotiables (link to post?) what are some things that are abolsutely important to your health and well-being? Don’t loose sight of those just because the person you’re with isn’t into that. The things that mean a lot to you. It’s all part of the two of you getting to know each other.
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